2010

I read A LOT. And my reading list is probably a bit different from yours. I'm just guessing that you don't read upwards of seven to ten blogs a day with subject matter ranging from self-help to marketing to spirituality to brain research to ridiculous nonsense.

The list of books I've read over the last year alone looks like that of someone with a severe, hybrid case of ADHD/Schizophrenia. The only thing that all of my reading materials have in common is the fact that they are all non-fiction (with the exception of the fluff I'm forced to read for Book Club and that endeavor is SO on life support).

The reason I give you all this background information on what my daily reading habits entail (as if any of you could possibly care in the least little bit) is because recently several different sources have touched on the same theme. The theme, in and of itself, isn't particularly surprising given that we are about to end one decade and begin another. What is a bit surprising is how all of what I just so happen to read has come together to form a rather interesting concept that I'd like to share with you.

Ok, so first there's Christine Kane. She just might be my long-lost twin sister. She too has a penchant for "focusing" on a variety of different areas. She's a singer-songwriter/life coach/writer/public speaker/creativity consultant (I'm not making that up). In other words, she's my hero.

She developed an exercise to replace the dreaded New Year's resolution on account of New Year's resolutions are passe and, oh yeah, THEY DON'T WORK. She suggests that you pick one word to set your intention for the coming year and she has a tool that you can use to choose yours at the link above.

What's my word? Hold your horses! We're getting there but first, a bit more background information. (Did I just hear a collective groan from the crowd?)

On to Seth Godin. Seth Godin is a best-selling author/marketing guru/business-trend predictor/etc. He wrote the book TRIBES which was instrumental in helping me find Ning, which in turn helped me start my online women's group All in the Same Boat. The Boat is now sunk (for all intents and purposes) but that experience has been invaluable and it gave me the knowledge to create a website for the Dongoskis in a fairly short amount of time after their life-altering, punch to the gut in early November.

So a couple of weeks ago, I received a link to an ebook that Seth Godin put together designed to get people thinking in a new and different way in this very new and different time that we have all entered. Over seventy people contributed to the ebook which consists of one page, mini-essays with one word titles. Are you seeing a theme developing here? Ok, stay with me...

The ebook is called WHAT MATTERS NOW and it's fanfreekingtastic! I love it. There's enough blog fodder in it to keep me rambling through 2010 and beyond. (Good news, huh?)

One of my favorite essays contained in this work of pure genius was written by a guy named Hugh Macleod, another hybrid, hyperactive schizo. Get this. He's a cartoonist/author/blogger/entrepreneur. Again, another one of my People. Oh, and by the way, this dude has a sick, twisted sense of humor which has further endeared him to me for life.

So his essay, entitled Meaning, isn't really an essay at all but rather a seemingly random collection of sentences compiled and formed into the shape of a block (see picture above). I could spend the rest of 2010 taking a sentence a week from Macleod's block of inspirational brilliance and use it by expanding upon and waxing poetic here, ad nauseum. (If that doesn't get you fired up about frequenting Rambling Shmee in 2010, nothing will.)

Ok, so one of the sentences in the block is "Everybody has their own private Mount Everest they were put on this earth to climb."

Boom.

What? No boom for you? You don't think this is a meaning-of-life statement of the highest magnitude? Well I beg to differ. I read the ebook (in its entirety) for the first time on December 15th and that one statement rattled around in my brain, knocking bottles off of shelves and inciting mini-riots all over the place for the better part of two weeks. I kept asking myself, "If I were put on this earth to overcome one thing, then what in the hell is it?" I saw it as my mission in life to determine exactly what my own private Mount Everest is.

In the meantime, Christine Kane and her band of groupies were posting daily pieces discussing their One Word selections for 2009 and how the exercise had worked out for them. All of this thought provocation was driving me a little nuts (I know, short trip) until I added the holidays into the mix.

As I mentioned in some previous posts, I had made it my mission in life to not stress and freak out and make myself and everyone I love miserable this holiday season. And I did it. I succeeded in holding off the full Shmee meltdown until December 29th (a new World record, by the way). But it wasn't easy and when the lid finally did blow off the pot, I noticed something: those things that finally got to me all fell under the heading of Perfection.

Eureka! That was it! Suddenly all the pieces fit. I finally heard the click as the tumblers of my brain slide into place and the secret door swung open exposing my own private Mount Everest. (Insert awe-inspiring, angelic chorus here.) Just like that I saw what stood behind my life-long, bone-crushing craving for everything to be perfect.

It's my old friend Fear.

I thought he was dead. I had a funeral and everything. It was lovely.

Turns out that much like a cat, Fear has nine lives. He's a resilient sucker and he's not above laying low (like Voldemort) until you're warm and snugly and thinking you've got this whole life thing figured out. Then he worms his way back in, little by little, so slowly that you barely notice that he's back. Until you wake up in the middle of the night and realize that your thoughts are focusing on THE MENU FOR NEW YEAR'S DAY and WHETHER YOUR PARENTS WILL PROPERLY ENTERTAIN YOUR CHILDREN ON NEW YEAR'S EVE!!!!!

What? This is what's keeping you awake at night?

Yeah, it is. That and every other ridiculous shit-nugget that I'm worried about and afraid of.

So that's it. My own private Mount Everest to climb is Fear (actually I ultimately think this is all of our Mount Everest's) and my One Word for 2010 is... (drum roll please)... Fearless. It's appropriate on so many levels but none more so than the fact that it's New Years and it's a fresh start and in a lot of ways, I'm back to square one and ready to try again.

This time, I'm going about it a little differently. The permanent eradication of Fear is no longer my goal. I think I've learned enough to know that he's indestructible. You can't really destroy him. You can only hope to contain him. Containment comes from exposing him for what he is and minimizing his effect on your life. It's kind of like saying, "Oh look, there's Fear everybody! Say hello to Fear. Now, go sit in the corner while I enjoy and make the best of my life. That's a good boy. Here's a biscuit."

My posts for the next couple of weeks are going to be dedicated to exposing Fear and then politely asking him to shut the hell up. I hope you'll join me in living a life with a little less fear in it. (Get it? Less fear. Fear less. Nice play on words, huh?) Whatever.

Happy New Year, friends. Thanks for indulging this very lengthy ramble!